Suicide isnt an option, keep telling yourself that. Im wondering if youve seen the post If Only: Self-Blame After a Loved Ones Suicide. She is an amazing musician. West was born in Walnut Creek and lived briefly in Castro Valley before her family moved to Pleasanton. And I got very drunk every time I drank after that, which was quite often. She replied, She probably figured she could fix you. This was the beginning of my recognition of the fact that I wasnt the horrible person I made myself out to be, in fact, my story is very much like a lot of alcoholics Ive met. I hope you believe your words here, or at least are beginning to. Sydney West was last seen near the Golden Gate Bridge in the early morning hours of Sept. 30, walking near Crissy Field. He recovered physically, but mentally he is now depressed and on anti-depressants,has anxiety attacks, is too emotional for working, and keeps saying he wishes he had succeeded with his attempt as he feels a burden to everyone. Edit: FAQs https://findsydneywest.com/faq, https://www.pollyklaas.org/missing-children/sydney-west/, https://pleasantonweekly.com/news/2021/09/30/what-a-week-find-sydney-west, https://www.kron4.com/news/bay-area/searching-for-sydney-san-francisco-police-still-asking-for-publics-help/?fbclid=IwAR2uVE3anCjr5EvpUerTiD6JZxCAENR83-xIRz3TRzAfRuGckyYFzRqnobM, https://storiesoftheunsolved.com/2020/11/27/the-disappearance-of-sydney-west/. She was carrying a black backpack and her light brown hair was pulled back into a bun. But as long as your solution is to kill yourself , you wont see them even if theyre right in front of you. It's not hard to kill yourself at the Golden Gate bridge. Have had lots of therapy after that. As 6 months passes where we have not seen or heard fromSydney, it becomes increasingly painful, her parents, Jay and Kimberly West, said in a statement provided to SFGATE. Im sorry to hear about all the pain youve been through. Note: I wanted to make this post to hopefully create some sort of discussion around the case since it was almost a year and a half ago. Not having the courage to fulfill my plan, I checked into treatment centers and each time I checked out I sank into suicidal depression again. Too, people who attempt suicide may receive the help they need afterwards. She had moved in with friends in San Francisco, where she was living when she disappeared. Missing person: The San Francisco Police Department is asking the public to report any information regarding 19-year-old Sydney West who was last seen on Sept. 30, 2020, at SF's Crissy Field. This case has always stuck with me because I am in my 20s and suffer from anxiety and depression. If you enjoyed this article, subscribe now to receive more just like it. West's parents are asking anyone who may have been commuting or exercising on the bridge to come forward with anything they may have seen. PLEASANTON, Calif. (KRON) Nearly a year has gone by since a Bay Area college student, Sydney West, vanished in San Francisco. Praying for you. The man who tried to find fame by jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge I supported her desire to stop taking her medication. A view of the Golden Gate Bridge with San Francisco behind it in January 1947. After my attempt at suicide, I tried to find information about my feelings and what others were feeling. Sydney Kaitlyn West, 19, was last seen near the Golden Gate Bridge around 6:45 a.m. on September 30, 2020. It was apparently very foggy that morning. Friends and family may rally to their side. West was in the Bay Area to take summer classes at UC Berkeley; she was supposed to enter school in the fall, but due to a concussion she sustained and classes being held remotely, she opted to defer for another year but stayed in California with family friends. Key to my recovery was becoming realistic about my part in creating the calamity called my life, but also needed to recognize others responsibilities as well. People are stupid. But what if you dont want help? Log In Sign Up. Sydney West - Disappeared The Golden Gate Bridge is the number one suicide site in the world. SFGATE's Editor-at-Large Andrew Chamings is a British writer in San Francisco. You can read more about this at http://www.bmj.com/content/341/bmj.c4447. I am so very grateful now to be alive and I hope to find ways to assist others going through the deep abyss that can sometimes take over your entire being take another breath, and another. "We have a lot of people that are asking us for information.". The Oscars will air on ABC and can be streamed on ABC.com and the ABC app as well as Hulu + Live TV, YouTube TV, AT&T TV or FuboTV. God Bless You. Wests parents led a socially-distanced vigil in Pleasanton last Thursday. This is perhaps why only one of Rhodes' three small parachutes opened, doing nothing to slow him down. Woke up yesterday and realized I needed to make another pilgrimage before the series begins. Had she jumped somebody definitely would have noticed, and it would've been caught on CCTV (the cameras are placed on light poles so fog does not block). Car plunges off California elevated highway, 3 people killed. But 10 years later, Im there again. At times I hate myself. 15, 12, by Americaoncoffee. Thats simply not true, but it took stepping outside my beliefs, becoming teachable and following the leads of others to find a life worth living. You can learn more about me here. West took a rideshare service to the Golden Gate Bridge; the driver cooperated with San Francisco police and is not believed to be a suspect. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. If your child will play baseball or softball this spring, youll need to stock up on appropriate clothing and equipment. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Those two have shown some effectiveness at reducing suicidal ideation and behavior. All theses years following, I did not feel good about myself, am reunited with my nephew, reading up on how to talk to him. She has blonde hair and blue eyes, and was last seen wearing a sweatshirt, dark-colored shorts and blue Vans sneakers. There is a strength within you. Ive worked in Mental health, Ive lost a family member through suicide. After all, they were intent on dying. I know there will be a lot of people out there who will think a certain thing happened to Sydney. And now I have the means to do it. Clad in two suits, weighted boots, football padding, another rubber suit and a football helmet that onlookers described as giving him a man-from-Mars look, Rhodes also had three parachutes on his back to ease his fall. As well, though, I believe I may have accidentally given myself something like ECT. The 265-foot plunge off the most famous bridge in the world was right in his wheelhouse, until it wasnt. I interviewed her parents.https://t.co/tiBGM53NZz pic.twitter.com/lvHh2cCrZg. His passing causes lots of pain, sadness and changed others lives entirely. These findings are consistent with other studies that have looked at method substitution, which can occur when one suicide method is made unavailable and people substitute it with another. I tried to help her, I really did Except I didnt. 2023 Audacy, Inc. All rights reserved. At 11:45 a.m. on Sept. 20, 2013 Kyle Gamboa stopped his truck in the middle of the highway, stepped out, ran onto the pedestrian walkway and jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge to his death. Press J to jump to the feed. For me, the will to live kicked in. I know you mean well, but I always feel I wished I never survived. My brother did the same in 2002. ive suffered depression for Years, 2 suicide attempts in 2008. Aside from seeing a therapist, I didnt find anything out there to help. I think it could be helpful to you. This is perhaps the best argument for preventing suicide. West was last seen on the Golden Gate Bridge onSept. 30, 2020 just before 7 a.m., according to the San Francisco Police Department. I tried commiting suicide and ended up brain dead Then after I got out of the coma, I was put in rehab for 11 months where I kept trying to break my neck and die because I missed my fiance so much (he wasnt allowed to visit me because he had attempted suicide with me too since he didnt want to live without me). I hope you can find peace within. "Folks that have seen anything that resembles Sydney, we really want to collect information.". Taking into account suicides that might have been missed by researchers, Dr. Seiden stated that 90% of people who tried to jump off the Golden Gate Bridge did not go on to die by suicide. Im sorry youre feeling so bad that your suicide seems, to you, to be inevitable. ChiMaxx, thank you for writing and for raising important points in your comment. She was last seen in the area around 6:45 a.m. Footage in the area, according to a website the family recently set up in light of her disappearance, was blocked by fog and morning haze. I recently lost a good friend to suicide. I just hope that one day her family will get answers. Her father grew worried when she didnt call the next day the day she was last spotted in San Francisco. Your Privacy Choices (Opt Out of Sale/Targeted Ads). Come home.. China sets this year's economic growth target at 'around 5%', Year after the slap, Chris Rock punches back in new special, Biden's Selma visit puts spotlight back on voting rights, Trump pitches a sequel, but shies away from attacking rivals, 20 cars of Norfolk Southern cargo train derail in Ohio, Indonesia fuel depot fire kills 19; 3 still missing, Athlete dead in shipwreck left Pakistan to help disabled son, China expands defense budget 7.2%, marking slight increase, Trump adviser Kellyanne Conway and husband are divorcing, Teen hikers rescued after days stuck in California snowstorm. "There were many people in that vicinity during that time," said Mr. West. Kevin Hines Jumped Off the Golden Gate Bridge, and Survived - Psycom She took a ride-share service. Any suggestions? Maybe some of the posts on this site could be helpful to him? Im sorry to hear of your loss You note that installation of a suicide barrier at the Bloor Viaduct in Toronto merely caused people to go to other locations in Toronto to die by suicide. 10 Reasons Teens Avoid Telling Parents about Suicidal Thoughts. She was last seen around 6:45 am when she was dropped off by a rideshare driver. Someone may have seen something -- any piece of information could help lead us to Sydney," parents Kimberly and Jay West said in a joint statement. How could I have been so stupid? We certainly do need to continue educating people about suicide prevention, including the reality that most people who survive a suicide attempt choose life afterwards. In Toronto, the barrier at the Bloor Viaduct did not reduce the number of people who died of suicide by jumping in the city; it just moved them to other locations. Therapists and doctors may help provide relief. Your message here is a good one. Copyright 2023 Nexstar Media Inc. All rights reserved. Andrew Chamings is an editor at SFGATE. West's parents are asking anyone who may have been. A narcissistic parent doesnt cause suicide, either lifes problems do or mental illness does. The Mystery Of Sydney West's Disappearance - Grunge.com I think this message needs to be made more clear and put in ads, etc. Her family is not giving up hope that she is still alive and remains determined to find her. He says he fully expected to speak with her the next day and became very worried when she didnt return multiple calls from him. The main principle to this is very simple Taking energy and harnessing it for the good and nothing can go wrong.. Your email address will not be published. Millions of eyes are going to locate her better than 20 sets, Jay West said. $10K Reward Offered In Search For UC Berkeley Freshman Sydney West Try convincing someone like me that life is worth it. As a person who has tried countless times to end my life, even shooting myself in the head, we are stuck living with yet another feeling of failure when we fail and continue suffering. Anyone interested in following the investigation may do so on Facebook or Instagram, and tag posts with #FindSydneyWest. Hi Joan. They planned to reconvene in L.A. the following day to hatch a plan to monetize the footage. SAN FRANCISCO (CBS SF) The family of a UC Berkeley freshman who disappeared last September has offered a $10,000 reward for information in connection with the case. More often than not, the crisis passes. This Walking Pad treadmill made getting 10,000 steps a How to get tickets for Depeche Mode's new tour dates. Although severe depression led him to jump off the bridge, Kevin Hines has stated: The very second I let go, I knew I had made a big mistake.. They're asking anyone "who may have been walking, biking, running, who commute over the bridge particularly Wednesday mornings at that time" to share information. The night before she disappeared (Sept. 29) she and her father Jay West had a lengthy phone conversation according to her family. of the different medications. Peace be with you Steven. America feeds narcissistic women because their joy is in materialistic consumption, the backbone of this country that once believed life had a higher purpose. I am dead broke, have exhausted both my savings and retirement stash, I am about to have my car repod and cant find a job. According to San Francisco Police Department (SFPD) her family reported her missing two days after she was last seen on Oct 2, 2020. Video footage from the bridge has been carefully reviewed by investigators but due to foggy and smoky conditions camera views where obstructed making it impossible to tell her exact location on the bridge. 1998 - 2023 Nexstar Media Inc. | All Rights Reserved. Seidens study shows that those who encounter a personal, human intervention during the suicide attempt are less likely to end up dying of suicide (though he admits that another big percentage continue self-destructive behaviorse.g., excessive drinkingthat lead to an early natural death), but it says nothing about the efficacy of physical barriers. Lorraine Rhodes was destitute, and asked Show Folks of America to help pay for the funeral, which they did. And half of people who die by suicide had attempted suicide at least once previously. I also knew that there was no hope whatsoever for what was wrong with me. Simply put unless you die the battle won or pain doesnt matter. "I just want to reach out to all the folks that have been supporting us over the past almost month now, communicate that the support and the love that we get is just absolutely amazing," Wests dad, Jay West, said in the clip. In this clinical case conference, the authors begin by presenting vignettes to capture the diversity of bridge suicide. . Berkeley when she went missing on September 30, 2020. All clues so far, the family has revealed, have not been fruitful. And half of people who die by suicide had attempted suicide at least once previously. I am very sorry for your loss. Now I wonder whether I also pressed reset on my brain. That changes things. The ongoing survival of people who attempt suicide is not (always) inevitable. I woke up on my own after my first attempt. I saw the signs, the depression, his feelings of hopelessness, but somehow its easier to see the signs after it happens and not while you are in the throes of this emotional rollercoaster. Others need to respect the decision. San Francisco police and the Orange County Sheriffs Office in North Carolina did not immediately respond to a request for comment from SFGATE. The attempt was no cry for help. I live with a higher purpose now, but prior to my children I went through hell and constantly entertained the thought of killing myself. My failure as a person was responsible for my extreme step. SF]. If I make it, Ill have publicity and be on my way, Rhodes told a friend who later testified at the coroners inquest. Also, I've authored the books Helping the Suicidal Person: Tips and Techniques for Professionals and Loving Someone with Suicidal Thoughts: What Family, Friends, and Partners Can Say and Do. Anyone with information is asked to contact private investigator Scott Dudek at (925) 705-8328 or Dudek.associates@gmail.com. There is not much known about the day Sydney disappeared. When I arrived at the #FindSydneyWest vigil in Pleasanton, I said whoever is singing has a beautiful voice. Joshua Bote is the tech editor at SFGATE. Me and my childrens life broke into pieces and our life will never be the same. The persons reasons for dying may begin to fade. Written forwww.speakingofsuicide.com. Where Are They Now?: The Fate of Suicide Attempt Survivors Sydney West never returned home, and has not been heard from since. I use to hate her for wanting to leave me, got diagnosed w depression at 15 have done so many therapy sessions. Youve been through an enormous amount. Precious few people survive such a fall; the water about 200 feet below acts the same as concrete when a person lands on it at high speed. Missing Ex-Cal Student Last Seen On Golden Gate Bridge Her family still has hope that they will one day find her. Wests parents said they have now hired a private investigator who is working with the San Francisco Police Department and Orange County (North Carolina) Sheriffs Department. She was a student at Donlon Elementary and Hart Middle schools and attended Foothill High School for her freshman and sophomore years. The longitude and latitude for the Bridge location is approximately: N 37 Degrees, 49 Minutes, 8.0 Seconds --- W 122 Degrees, 28 Minutes, 40.6 Seconds. So they dont die, but continue miserable lives wishing for it to be over. The Golden Gate Bridge crosses the Golden Gate Strait and connects the City of San Francisco and the County of Marin to the north. But in reality, he cant know what the future holds. It would be logical to assume that being prevented from jumping merely delayed their death. It gives me a good opportunity to dispel concerns that others may have, too. It is believed that she had moved out of the dorms into an apartment with some friends near campus. There were probably signs that you had a drinking problem from the very beginning. It was a startling revelation. I wear various hats: I created and maintain this website, Speaking of Suicide, I'm an associate professor at the University of Denver Graduate School of Social Work, and I have a psychotherapy and consulting practice. Watching "The Bridge" -- a new documentary that captures 23 suicide jumps from the bridge . Look at life this way Instead of allowing a human being to be a target almost like a bomb dropping on ringed target Simply flip the idea of all the violence and fear over..Draw a Large Heart then several hearts within Make a plan for dreams and plans Stick to it .. Berkeley. I just need time to tidy up affairs, belongings, finances, assemble the plan. Where Are They Now? similar to cancer ads, etc. Thanks for sharing your story here. Kevin Hines Jumped Off The Golden Gate Bridge - YouTube We interviewed our tech expert, Jaime Vazquez, to learn more about accessible smart home devices. She tried to take her life when I was 12. Your Privacy Choices (Opt Out of Sale/Targeted Ads). Thank you for reaching out to Joan and offering your support. Her mother Kimberly West has said to a journalist The bridge was quite busy (that day). Privacy Policy. (felt good to be honest for once). Dressed in a blue sweatshirt, leggings and Vans slip-on sneakers,. Six months after student's disappearance in San Francisco - SFGATE Jumpers | The New Yorker Case Contact Information: SFPD at 415-575-444 or text TIP411 (Start your message with SFPD) Or contact: private investigator Scott Dudek at 925-705-8328 or dudek.associates@gmail.com, *there is a reward for information that leads to her location and return, For more info: https://findsydneywest.com/ Facebook: Find Sydney West Instagram @find_sydney_west Polly Klaas Foundation: https://www.pollyklaas.org/missing-children/sydney-west/, Sources: https://pleasantonweekly.com/news/2021/09/30/what-a-week-find-sydney-west https://www.kron4.com/news/bay-area/searching-for-sydney-san-francisco-police-still-asking-for-publics-help/?fbclid=IwAR2uVE3anCjr5EvpUerTiD6JZxCAENR83-xIRz3TRzAfRuGckyYFzRqnobM https://storiesoftheunsolved.com/2020/11/27/the-disappearance-of-sydney-west/. Had medical intervention on the second. You might think that, once freed from the authority figures who prevented their suicide on the bridge, they still went on to by suicide. Between 1937 and 2012, an estimated 1,400 bodies were recovered of people who had jumped from the Golden Gate Bridge, located in the San Francisco Bay Area in the United States.. West's family urges anyone with information about the case is asked to contact Scott Dudek, their investigator, who can be reached at 925-705-8328. So when crazy people did crazy things in public places, excited crowds would gather. Life.church has some really good online sermons I highly suggest that. 2021 CBS Broadcasting Inc. All Rights Reserved. "Jump." That's the word Kevin Hines heard in his head on September 25, 2000, as he stood on the Golden Gate Bridge. In February 2009, following the murder of a four-year-old girl who was thrown off the bridge by her father, the first stage of a temporary suicide barrier was erected on Westgate Bridge, constructed of concrete crash barriers topped with a welded mesh fence. Rhodes had been seeking fame all his life, and successfully became one of Hollywoods first stuntmen, appearing in movies such as "Under Arizona Skies" and "Duel in the Sun," in which he performed a cliff jump. Her Disappearance: Sydney West was a 19-year-old freshman at U.C. It turns out that I had, and still have, many misconceptions about myself and the people in encounter. Keep pushing on. He has no one else but me. Wishing you peace, I am both, not realizing this until reading today My dad ended his life by his own hands , when I was 9. When I will be talking to him, also sure helps me to see I am suicide attempt survivor. Police do not necessarily believe there was foul play involved, according to an interview Rueca had with KRON4. Although severe depression led him to jump off the bridge, Kevin Hines has stated: "The very second I let go, I knew I had made a big mistake." Challenges, extreme challenges. He jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge and survived. Now, he's - CNN I know that this surprises many people. I fantasize a lot about suicide. Its impossible to know but something to consider, in case youre only considering the set of possibilities for which you blame yourself. You might be helped by connecting with other people who have attempted suicide and can understand not only what can lead a person to do that, but also what comes after. SF]. As a teenager, I related so closely and had so many mixed emotions in comparing the results of my vs the characters attempts. She is described as a white female, 5'10" and weighing about 130 pounds. She was last seen September 30, 2020, from the San Francisco area near the Golden Gate Bridge specifically around Crissy field. The Pittsburg Sun-Telegraph on May 2, 1948. She struggled with being so far away from her parents and sister, who reside in North Carolina. "We know that there was a lot of pedestrian, car and bicycle traffic on the Golden Gate Bridge the morning Sydney disappeared. She was, for a period of time, carrying a black backpack that she frequently used to get around town. Anyone in the Bay Area with any information regarding her disappearancecan contact Sgt. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. We talked a lot about loving each other. Horrified spectators screamed and mothers covered their childrens eyes as Chief Sundowns lifeless body bobbed under the bridge and out to sea. [This comment was edited, per the Comments Policy. Email: joshua.bote@sfgate.com and Signal: 707-742-3756, Six months after student's disappearance in San Francisco, family continues search, Horoscope for Saturday, 3/04/23 by Christopher Renstrom, Snowboarder dies at Tahoe ski resort following historic blizzard, West I-80 closed near Tahoe due to snow and 'multiple spinouts', Wife of Jeffrey Vandergrift issues somber update, Even Salesforces tower HQ isnt safe from office cuts, Inside Harry and Meghans favorite In-N-Out, Horoscope for Friday, 3/03/23 by Christopher Renstrom, Massive Lake Tahoe waterfront compound slashes price by $20M, This beloved East Bay hybrid cafe and bike shop is closing, Ja Morant says he'll get help after video shows apparent gun. Has he tried cognitive behavior therapy? I was able to make it out of the hopelessness and despair that led to my attempt. There are some reports that Sydney may have suffered from depression. Being a freshman and isolated on campus due to the COVID pandemic was hard for West, her family said. My mother battled w depression I watched her battle hard all my life and still. "Syd," as she liked to be called, was initially thought to have last been seen or heard from early the morning of September 30 in the Crissy Field area. (findsydneywest.com) West was last seen on the morning of Sept. 30 on the iconic bridge. Sign promoting a 24/7 crisis text line on the Golden Gate Bridge. Family of Sydney West, missing UC Berkeley student, renews search January 25, 2021 / 11:03 AM She was last seen in long, dark leggings, a teal hooded sweatshirt and slip-on Vans in a dark green and black print. An estimated 1,600 people have committed suicide by jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge, which has warnings but no barrier. Berkeley when she went missing on September 30, 2020. She is described as standing 5'10", weighing about 130 pounds, with light brown hair and blue eyes and possibly wearing glasses. I wish you all the very best and I pray you each find a way to manage and control the thoughts of suicide. Leads continue to come in, her parents said. There are far more narcissistic dads and men than there are women and mothers. Sydney Harbour Bridge has a suicide prevention barrier. I wish everyone could receive this gift, and I am grateful that you and others have done so! Rhodes, who also went by his native Navajo name Chief Sundown, was no stranger to danger. It is important to note that there has been no activity on her phone, bank accounts, or social media accounts since Sept. 30. Bonnie. A good place to start is the Facebook group Live Through This. Suicide From the Golden Gate Bridge | American Journal of Psychiatry That's a mind-blowing statement. Thanks for sharing, Anne. I am resigned to staying alive until I die in some other way. The Jumpers | Psychology Today Wests parents confirmed in a new video released late Thursday she was last seen shortly before 7 a.m. on the Golden Gate Bridge. "Jump." That's the word Kevin Hines heard in his head on September 25, 2000, as he stood on the Golden Gate Bridge.
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